225 – Ron Janowczyk of Colleyville, TX, Father of Three and Founder of Special Strong of Northeast Tarrant County

Transcript:

Tom Couch: Special thanks to Horizon Therapeutics for sponsoring the Special Fathers Network Dad to Dad Podcast, working tirelessly to research, develop, and bring forward medicines for people living with rare and rheumatic diseases. Discover more about Horizon Therapeutics’ mission at HorizonTherapeutics.com.

Ron Janowczyk: And we got lucky. Somebody from my company called and said, look I understand that Jake was born with Williams syndrome. I happen to have a friend who has a daughter who’s about four years old named Kimmy. She wasn’t but maybe an hour away from us, and we were able to go down there and meet Kimmy who was just a ball of energy and one of the most pleasant little four-year-olds to ever meet in your life. And we got back in the car with a big collective sigh of relief. Okay, A, we know what “cocktail personality” now means, and B, if Jake is anything like that, there is some blue sky ahead. There really is. And that was so helpful. So helpful.

Tom Couch: That’s our guest this week, Ron Janowczyk, a wine industry veteran and owner of Special Strong, a sports facility for folks with special needs. Ron has three kids, including Jake, 26, who has Williams syndrome. We’ll hear about Ron’s years in the wine industry and about his new venture providing a place for people with special needs to work out. That’s all on this week’s Special Fathers Network Dad to Dad Podcast. Say hello now to our host, David Hirsch.

David Hirsch: Hi, and thanks for listening to The Dad to Dad Podcast, fathers mentoring fathers of children with special needs, presented by the Special Fathers Network.

Tom Couch: The Special Fathers Network is a dad to dad mentoring program for fathers raising children with special needs. Through our personalized matching process, new fathers with special needs children connect with mentor fathers in a similar situation. It’s a great way for dads to support dads. To find out more, go to 21stCenturyDads.org.

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Tom Couch: And now let’s hear this conversation between host David Hirsch and guest Ron Janowczyk.

David Hirsch: I am thrilled to be talking today with Ron Janowczyk of Colleyville, Texas, the father of three, a wine industry veteran and owner of Special Strong of Northeast Tarrant County, a sports facility that helps develop specialized fitness programs for people with mental, cognitive, and physical challenges. Ron, thank you for taking the time to do a Special Fathers Network Dad to Dad Podcast interview.

Ron Janowczyk: David, thank you for having me. Very much. I’m. honored.

David Hirsch: You and your wife, Gloria, have been married for 39 years and are the proud parents of three children. Lauren 35, Joe 33, and Jake 26 who has Williams syndrome. Let’s start with some background. Where did you grow up? Tell me something about your family.

Ron Janowczyk: Sure. I was born and raised in South Bend, Indiana. I am smack in the middle of five. I’m the oldest son. I do have a younger brother now who’s 12 years younger than I am. We didn’t travel much. There was one time that we moved, I think at the end of the third grade, to Cincinnati, Ohio. And then we moved back and that’s where I went to middle school and high school, and then on to the University of Notre Dame.

David Hirsch: Lots of South Bend in your background.

Ron Janowczyk: [laughing] Yes. My wife’s father coached linebackers at the University of Notre Dame for 26 seasons, I believe. So yes. I’m pretty tied to Notre Dame at South Bend, Indiana.

David Hirsch: That’s awesome. So out of curiosity, what does your dad do for a living?

Ron Janowczyk: My dad was an electrician. Yep. That’s how I learned to use tools and go on jobs with him. He was a man of a lot of grit, and that’s how he made a living.

David Hirsch: Where do you think that grit came from?

Ron Janowczyk: Probably his father. My grandpa Janowczyk worked at the same factory for 44 years. I believe it was called Simplicity Pattern up in Niles, Michigan. They bought these patterns and they were like paper thin, but you stack them thousands at a time and you cut them out with a band saw, and that’s what my grandfather did. And then when he wasn’t doing that, he would be a cabinet maker for people, not only in his own home but for his friends. So again, a lot of tools there. So very self-made, hardworking kind of guy. And that was passed down to my father.

David Hirsch: I have the vision of a workbench with lots of tools. You’re prepared for every occasion.

Ron Janowczyk: There were two things he had a lot of: tools that he passed down to my dad, and pipes. Another thing you don’t see very much, but my grandfather probably had 30 pipes, I think we found 30 pipes. And I still miss that pipe smell as a young kid going into the house.

David Hirsch: That’s awesome. So how would you describe your relationship with your dad?

Ron Janowczyk: Loving. I was his first and oldest son. He spent a great deal of time with me, whether it was fishing or later hunting, teaching me how to play baseball, going to as many of my games as he possibly could. He led me along. Told me how to respect women and get along with my three sisters and the things in life that were important.

David Hirsch: Yeah. It sounds like he was a role model dad.

Ron Janowczyk: Tough though. Tough. Frequently nothing was good enough, right? Dad, I gotta B plus on this. Why wasn’t it an A minus? I got an A minus. Why wasn’t it an A? And then why wasn’t it an A plus? He definitely drove me pretty hard.

David Hirsch: Do you think it was his military background?

Ron Janowczyk: I think so. He used terms like, hey, get that squared away. Things that you would learn in the Marine Corps all the time. Sure. I think that was part of it. That was his way of putting some discipline and structure to what I did and how I thought.

David Hirsch: So any important takeaways, a lesson learned or two that come to mind when you think about your dad?

Ron Janowczyk: Yeah, my dad was a pretty generous guy. I can remember sitting at restaurants with my father where my dad would get the bill and later I learned my mom was looking over at the tip that he was going to leave. And it didn’t matter where we were. My dad always was considered a big tipper. That’s what I heard my mom call him. And I asked him about that one time in the car and he said, these people are also trying to make a living and they’ve got kids like you at home. And just because they don’t have a toolbox like me, doesn’t mean that they’re not doing a good job. And so I simply give them, I honor them with what I leave them. And I have never forgotten that. Now I think that would give you a glimpse into my father’s generosity and respect for somebody who’s just working hard.

David Hirsch: Yeah. Thanks for sharing. It’s really important insight.

You had mentioned that you went to University of Notre Dame. My recollection was you took degrees in philosophy and marketing, and then you headed out to California and you were in the wine industry for almost four decades.

Ron Janowczyk: I was. It’s the only business that I know up until today. I was just glad to have made it through Notre Dame. My ability to get in was either the grace of God or an administrative error. I still to this day believe that I was a lead balloon on the average SAT, that my manila folder was stuck below someone else’s that was approved. And that’s how I got in.

All kidding aside. I was not gifted with a really great intellect. So I worked really hard. I spent a lot of time in the library. But look, I do not regret any of it. Notre Dame was a great experience, really great experience. So I was lucky enough to be recruited. Ernest and Julio’s sons, Joe and David, both went to Notre Dame. So I was recruited by Gallo, went to Southern California and I stayed with that organization for the better part of eight years. And then moved on, worked for two other companies and had a very blessed career. Was around a couple of very large transactions that benefited our family. And so in November after a little over 38 years in the wine business, I was able to retire.

David Hirsch: That’s fabulous. So if you had to share something about the wine business with our listeners, since you probably have more experience than virtually every one of the other 500+ mentor fathers, what would it be?

Ron Janowczyk: [laughing] Oh boy. Be an equal opportunity drinker. It doesn’t matter whether you drink pink, white or red. You might have your preference but drink ’em all. And then I would always tell people, especially today, there are almost no flawed wines from a technical aspect. All wine is really good, that wines are simply not better than one another. Don’t get hung up in that. They’re just different.

David Hirsch: Yeah. So I think what comes to mind is that everybody’s taste is a little bit different. What might taste good to you might not taste good to me. So it’s a matter of your palate, and finding things that you enjoy.

Ron Janowczyk: You bet. Exactly.

David Hirsch: Excellent. Thanks for sharing. Let’s talk about special needs first on a personal level and then beyond. And I’m curious to know, prior to Jake’s diagnosis, did you or Gloria have any exposure to the special needs community?

Ron Janowczyk: We did not. No, on either side. There was no family members or any, not even close friends that I can think of that had any challenges of any kind.

David Hirsch: So what is Jake’s diagnosis and how did that diagnosis come about?

Ron Janowczyk: Jake was probably about eight weeks old and he clearly wasn’t eating or keeping things down, wasn’t chunking up like our other kids had. And we ended up taking him to a doctor who then directed us to University of California, San Francisco, UCSF. He was, after about a day, he was seen by a few doctors and then given this label of “failure to thrive,” which is that general catch-all for, we don’t know what to tell you yet. And so there was an army of people that came in and out of that room and looked at Jake. And finally one day a woman walked in with a long white coat on and turned him over and looked really closely at his face. And said, I think I know what’s “wrong” with your child. Not exactly a word you want to hear, but nonetheless, this is the first doctor that said something with a little certainty. She said, but I’m gonna need your permission to grow some of his cells in the lab for 72 hours.

Sure enough, she comes back with the test results and shows us these fluorescent markers on his seventh chromosome that showed a clear black gap in one pair of those chromosomes, and then explained to us that was the confirming test for Jake having been born with Williams syndrome.

That’s about all she said. She handed us a black and white piece of paper that was probably just something she had copied off of a Google page somewhere and left. And nurses came in shortly after that and said, you’ll be able to be discharged later today. That’s how we started with Jake.

David Hirsch: Sounds very abrupt.

Ron Janowczyk: Yes.

David Hirsch: Sounds very abrupt. Yeah. That’s the first you learned about Williams syndrome, and my recollection was that this was early on 25 years ago when genetic testing was just really starting to become more popular.

Ron Janowczyk: Yes. I believe, after having met with folks at the Williams Syndrome Association, that we were so lucky. Because that was the first year that there was a confirming test for Williams syndrome, that up until that point, they thought that there were many people in the population walking around that had either been misdiagnosed or underdiagnosed. Today, it’s still fairly rare. Williams syndrome, the population of Williams syndrome in America today is roughly 30 to 32,000 people.

David Hirsch: Is that nationally or is that internationally?

Ron Janowczyk: Nationally.

David Hirsch: Okay. 30 to 32,000 in the US. Okay. That sounds like a large number, but relative to the total population, obviously very small. If it was being misdiagnosed or underdiagnosed, what would it be similar to or confused with without the genetic testing? Do you have any sense?

Ron Janowczyk: A lot of people pointed out that there are very similar facial features among kids with Williams syndrome, not unlike Down syndrome. They didn’t have a great deal of coordination or could easily gain weight as a result of that. Some of them with eyesight and thicker glasses. Those are things that we thought, wow I think we know some folks with Down syndrome who fall under that same… But it is clearly not. There’s a deletion on this chromosome. There’s not an extra chromosome. And so there was really nothing that we had to compare it to. It was a black hole for a while there.

David Hirsch: So thinking back to the day, days, weeks after you got the diagnosis, what were some of the fears that you and Gloria had at the time?

Ron Janowczyk: I think they’re probably common for anyone with a diagnosis, and that’s just this great unknown. What will my child become? What hardships might they have? For that first couple of days, guilt. This world is hard enough. What did we do to cause this child to be born that would make his journey through life even more difficult? We have since found out that it is a completely random genetic event. It had nothing to do with us but that lingered for a while. It really did. I’m just being honest about it. That was hard on us.

David Hirsch: Yeah. Thanks for being transparent and authentic about that. I’m wondering, was there any meaningful advice that you got early on that helped put things in perspective or helped give you a renewed focus?

Ron Janowczyk: If you looked at the information they first gave us, and then we obviously did more of our own research, one of the things that stood up to us was, I don’t know what this is gonna look like, but this is cool. They were described as having “cocktail-like personalities.” Really? [chuckles] Later we found out what that was. Jake used to be called the Mayor of Windsor where we lived. There isn’t anybody he doesn’t know or who doesn’t know him. So that sort of high social interaction was what they meant by that, that Jake would walk in a room anywhere and he’d be talking to them and we thought aside from everything else, intellectually, cognitively, that’s something we look forward to. I really want to see another child to see what that translates to.

And we got lucky. Somebody from my company called and said, look I understand that Jake was born with Williams syndrome. I happen to have a friend who has a daughter who’s about four years old named Kimmy. She wasn’t but maybe an hour away from us. And sure enough we called them, the Gainza family, and we were able to go down there and meet Kimmy who was just a ball of energy and one of the most pleasant little four-year-olds to ever meet in your life. And we got back in the car with a big collective sigh of relief. Okay, A, we know what “cocktail personality” now means, and B, if Jake is anything like that, there is some blue sky ahead. There really is. And that was so helpful. So helpful for us.

David Hirsch: Yeah. Thanks for sharing. I think that experiences like that remind me that there’s angels out in the universe, right? People that you meet. Maybe it’s the person at work that made the introduction. Maybe it was the Gainza family that you got to know early on that helped take some of the edge off or give you a sneak peek of maybe what to expect.

Ron Janowczyk: You bet. Absolutely there are.

David Hirsch: So were there some important decisions that you made as parents raising not just one child, but three children?

Ron Janowczyk: Yeah, the family aspect is interesting cuz our other kids weren’t exactly young adults yet, and they went through some of the same things we did. What’s that gonna mean for us and how are we gonna have to help? And how’s he gonna live? Simple questions. Is he gonna be able to feed himself? Can he dress himself? Are we gonna do that for them? And again, probably like a lot of families, that just drew us closer.

Jake became the nucleus of the family. And boy, the things that my kids must have learned, perhaps all of us learned. Things like just gratitude, perspective and patience and expectation and not to judge. Those things are just really important life skills that everybody gets, but you get them in spades when you have a member of your household that has some challenges.

David Hirsch: I wanted you to share the story about Cardinal Newman, because you mentioned that Joe went there and that was very, I think, pivotal. At least that’s what I remembered from a prior conversation.

Ron Janowczyk: It is. So our son Joe, Jake’s older brother, went to a private Catholic school in Santa Rosa, California called Cardinal Newman. And Jake went to all the games. He wore the shirts and the sweatshirts, and he was just Mr. Little Cardinal Newman. And so when it came time for Jake to go to high school, we looked at each other and said okay, what do we do now? They don’t have any program at all for kids with special needs. He was gonna end up having to go to the public school in our town.

And then we stopped to think about it a minute. And boy, this would be… If I could pass anything on to young dads considering something, it wouldn’t be to set limits. It would be to go into a situation like, okay, here’s where he’d like to go to high school but here are all the obstacles. Stop to consider what would it look like if Jake could go to that school? Under what circumstance or condition might this work? And that’s what my wife and I talked a great deal about.

Then I contacted the school, asked to see the folks in the admissions office, and went in there and made our presentation. Here’s Jake. Our son, Joe. Here’s what Williams syndrome is. Here’s how we think he learns best, how he wouldn’t learn best. And at the end I merely said, if you are the compassionate, caring Catholic institution you claim to be, you will look really hard at my kid. And look, being a sales guy, yes. That’s a mean-spirited close. But I meant every word. I just wanted him to get that chance.

And six weeks later, the high school football coach shows up, who knew my son Joe obviously really well, with an envelope and handed it to us. And we opened it up and it was Jake’s admission letter. And then of course the work started. But he is the first student they’ve ever taken aboard that’s had any special needs at all.

David Hirsch: Yeah. I love that story. He’s a pioneer of sorts. And what I heard in your pitch or your presentation to the admissions committee was laying on a little layer of Catholic guilt.

Ron Janowczyk: [hearty laughter] Oh man! It really was!

David Hirsch: Yeah. And it works, right? We do that as parents raising our kids and, why wouldn’t you use it in another context? And oh, I admire your vision and Gloria’s vision for what can be. Because you have to have some faith, honestly, to put yourselves, put your child in an environment where they’re not really set up like the public schools would be set up, right?

There’s some unknowns and some uncertainty, and no doubt it wasn’t a straight line. Everything didn’t work out perfectly. Some people were more accepting and inclusive than others. But you figure it out as you go along. And I’m hoping that just by virtue of what you just described, others listening to your story might also be able to draft on the experience that you just described.

And no doubt it wasn’t one-and-done. Jake was not the only person that went to this school, went to Cardinal Newman, with special needs. I’m sure that his experience there, your family’s experience, gave some confidence to other families in your community to do the same thing.

Ron Janowczyk: i sure hope so. Because I would say this: one of the things I said to that admissions group is I am absolutely convinced that Jake is going to have an effect on somebody’s life here. I’m not sure how, but I guarantee you he will have an effect on somebody’s life. And of course, in the back of our minds, we’re thinking a little bit of what’s the flip side of that? This is a very privileged college-bound, some would say sheltered group of kids. Is he gonna be, is he gonna be picked on?

And I would tell you the exact opposite happened. There was always somebody classes above him that took him under his wing and made sure that Jake got what Jake needed. It was just an experience that we weren’t quite expecting. Kids coming over to the house to spend time with him, things like that.

David Hirsch: Oh, wow.

Ron Janowczyk: Teachers willing to meet with us and accommodate him and how he learned and how he could get through the material and take the test and do things like that. Yeah, just a tremendous experience. I was thrilled. And of course you’re crying like you’re cutting onions, but they did a presentation for Jake. They have… It’s California, right? So the kids eat in a lunchroom outside. There is an area now that has a big wall on it, and it is called Jake’s Place.

David Hirsch: Very powerful.

I don’t want to focus on the negative. But to be real about it, I’m wondering what have been some of the biggest challenges? And I’m wondering very specifically if there was any resistance by other parents who might not have been as open-minded as others about having a child with special needs in the classroom sort of draining, if you will, some of the resources away from their kids,or being a distraction of any type.

Ron Janowczyk: That’s a very interesting question. David we were told, look, you guys are not gonna want to hear this. But it’s not just education. It could be in just society at large, that there are a group of people, let’s just call it 5%, who almost resent a child with special needs in the class. I’m not being paid to make accommodations for his lessons. And oh, by the way, your son is in constant motion. He rocks and that’s annoying to me. Okay. I guess, if you know that going in, you take an offensive approach to that, you say, how might we clear the way or ameliorate some of those issues?

And so one of the first things after he was accepted that was work for us, that we said was so important, is asking for a meeting of who his freshman teachers would be. We knew and were told that they met every summer as a group to get together and they set different teaching plans and things like that. And they did. They granted us 30 minutes with his freshman teachers where we came in and we described who Jake was. And shared with them all that we had learned about the education of a Williams syndrome child and how they learned best and what were some of the things that may come up.

We also assured them that there would be a part-time aid that we found who could assist Jake in a couple of his classes. Not all, but some. That could be somebody that they could communicate to almost daily to bring back information to us about Jake. But we came up with that. Especially in a school that doesn’t have a program, don’t think that they’re gonna come to you out of the goodness of their heart and say, this is what you guys really should think about doing. You really have to have an offensive-minded approach for that. And as everybody talks about, you gotta advocate for your child. You really do. It’s just something that you have to take an active interest in doing. And I think they appreciated that. Because every year that he was there, it became easier and easier.

David Hirsch: And post high school, I’m wondering what if any educational experience has Jake had?

Ron Janowczyk: Jake didn’t have an interest in going on to school, nor does he even today at 26, have an interest in living outside of this house. And we have looked at all of the options, including living with someone else. We have met a whole bunch of people in this community here in Texas that would make great housemates for him. And should we buy a house for him? Should we hire a full-time caretaker for that house? And he just, for reasons we don’t understand, doesn’t have an interest in it. So until he does, Jake will be part of this household.

David Hirsch: That’s fabulous.

Ron Janowczyk: He’s been working eight years at a place called Market Street here in Colleyville, a grocery store. Now imagine you got a cocktail personality and your job is to bag groceries and take them to the car. [laughing] So every 10 minutes you meet another human being and you get to spend time with him. I can’t think of a better job for him than that.

David Hirsch: Yeah it sounds like he’s perfectly suited for that.

Ron Janowczyk: He really is.

David Hirsch: And that’s where you are today. That might not be the situation a year or years down the road. So things evolve, right? Things change.

Ron Janowczyk: Yeah.

Tom Couch: We’ll be back with more of the conversation on the Special Fathers Network Dad to Dad Podcast in just a few moments. But first, this quick message. Please help 21st Century Dads gather research on families raising children with special needs by having them complete the Special Fathers Network Early Intervention Parents Survey. A link to the survey can be found in the show notes. As a token of our appreciation, each person, mom or dad, who completes the survey, will receive a Great Dad Coin. Thank you. Now back to the conversation.

David Hirsch: So I’m thinking about other organizations and the one that you mentioned was an employer, Market Street. What other organizations have played an important role for Jake or for your family for that matter?

Ron Janowczyk: Very early on, the William Syndrome Association. It’s based out of Detroit, but a really fine organization that held a national convention every year. And for us, going there even without Jake with us when he was still an infant, was probably the most impactful. And there’s so many different courses spread out throughout the day, taught by both parents and educators and specialists in each area. If you are worried about what he eats or doesn’t eat, you can go do that. If you wanna see… He likes music so much cuz there’s, I think 15% of the population of Williams kids have this unique ability, almost savant-like. They can’t read music, but they hear it and they can sit at an instrument and play it perfectly or sing in perfect tune. I think 60 Minutes actually did a piece on Williams syndrome in that regard one time, Morley Safer. But we’ve given him every opportunity to do that and he, although he loves music, loves going to concerts, there’s no music. He hasn’t created it in any way so far.

David Hirsch: So Williams Syndrome Association. Any others?

Ron Janowczyk: Sure. Special Olympics. The minute we saw that… There’s a continuum of most challenges for kids, whether they be physical or mental. Jake seemed to be at the high end of that spectrum. From early on, he could jump in a pool and I mean at four years old swim like a harbor seal. [laughing] That was something we noticed right away. He got on a skateboard or a scooter really fast. He could throw and catch a ball early on, and that hand-eye coordination wasn’t something that we were expecting. And so as soon as we could, we got him into Special Olympics and he competes to this day in three or four different sports. Jake has a hole in one!

David Hirsch: Whoa.

Ron Janowczyk: Jake had a hole in one on 147-yard par three while playing with his brother. And still to this day, I don’t know that he understands just the importance of that event. [laughing] Like he doesn’t tell everybody about it. I said, why wouldn’t you tell anybody about that, Jake? I’ve been playing golf a long time, 30, 40 years. I don’t have a hole in one. So there’s things like that. I can’t beat him in a game a horse. He can throw it up from the half court and make a lot of half court shots.

Jake’s athletic ability and sort of his fitness level, there was no question in our mind that contributed to his group of friends, and kids in school sort of gravitating towards him. And even when he was a little shaver, I remember that he would play with a ball at recess, and I remember the teacher coming to us and saying, he plays with all the kids in these games no problem. And if he’s playing by himself and he loses his ball and it goes on the other side, the other kids go run it down and say no, that’s Jake’s ball. And they bring it back to him. Even early on he was having that sort of effect on people just because he was such a great kid with a little bit of athleticism.

Special Olympics… huge. And I believe it’s gonna remain big in his life for many years to come. And I certainly hope so. There’s a couple of other places here since moving to Texas that he’s involved with. A Club Metro, which is more of a social thing. And there’s a community here called South Lake and they have something called the Miracle League of South Lake. The Texas Rangers came in, wrote a check, and built baseball fields exclusively for kids with special needs. Just a fantastic organization. And so he’s been involved in that. Yeah. When he’s not working, and he works a lot, he is always busy. Constantly busy.

David Hirsch: So he makes a living working at the food store. Does he have things that he saves for or that he spends money on, or does he have an understanding of the concept of money?

Ron Janowczyk: No he does not. And anyway, it is sort of funny. It’s almost a running joke. He’ll get his check and he’ll open it and say he didn’t work much. And one time he said, Dad I just opened this. It’s $87. Is that a lot of money? I said geez, Jake, if you don’t have any, that sure is a lot of money. And then he says to me, does that mean I have bank?

[laughing] I just cracked up. Yeah, Jake doesn’t spend a lot of his money, but he went and saw his brother in California, flew for the first time by himself. He bought his ticket. He loves music, so he always wants to buy concert tickets. And he was gifted enough to go to WrestleMania this year in Texas Stadium. He’s a big wrestling fan and buying his t-shirts and things like that. And I certainly always get a kick out of it when he says, Dad, I want to take you to lunch. And he offers to buy me a beer. 26-year-old Williams syndrome, Jake. Okay, Jake, thank you very much. I appreciate that.

David Hirsch: I love it. Thanks for sharing. Let’s switch gears and talk about Special Strong. My understanding is that there’s eight locations, seven there in Texas and one in Phoenix. And I’m wondering how’d you learn about it and why did you become an owner?

Ron Janowczyk: Sure. As I told you before, I was lucky enough to have retired back in 2019. And like a lot of people, I just sat down and started working on a bucket list with my wife. What is it you want to do? And let’s get a place at the lake so we could take our grandkids there and let’s make some trips back out to California and see Joe, whatever those things were.

And then one Sunday we’re sitting at a church service and prior to the church service, they’re showing different videos of upcoming events And up pops this vignette on a young man named Daniel Stein and the problems and educational obstacles that he had, and how his parents introduced him to a weight set in fitness and how that helped him deal with some of his issues.

And then back in 2016, he and his wife decided we’re gonna start a company because he had already been a personal trainer. We’re gonna start this company devoted to the fitness for people with special needs. And then he franchises. So we watched this video. And my wife looks at me and I look at her, and it was just one of those kind of looks: that was interesting. And we get in the car and we talked about it a little bit. But that was it.

So a couple of weeks pass and I go to a business leader’s conference. They showed the video again! Now they could’ve shown videos from anywhere, and they show this video again about a local guy from McKinney, Texas who started this business called Special Strong.

And I will tell you, it was never clear to me. I got in the car at that point and I said, okay, Lord, I am not the brightest bulb out here, but I know you’re pounding me over the head with this one. This is something you clearly want me to do. I get it. In hindsight I think He, like a lot of things, God just laughed about it. He said, you had this really nice almost 40-year career. I gifted you with all those blessings. But really, you just built your toolbox because now this is what I want you to do.

And so we talked about it and one of the toughest pitches I made, you could appreciate this, was having to go back and sit with my wife and look at her and say, honey by the way, can I get you a glass of wine? Maybe a bottle? What would you think about us unretiring? What? And of course I think she thought I was being recruited to come back into the wine business and I said, no, absolutely not. Remember that video that we saw? Let’s talk about that a little bit. Could we own and operate that franchise?

I got plenty of gas in my tank. We’ve been blessed with the resources to be able to do it. And I said, let’s really stop and take a look at why we think Jake has done as well as he has. Isn’t a part of it his coordination? Isn’t a part of it his fitness? He wasn’t born with all those things. He developed them over time by just playing with other kids. Don’t we want that? If it’s possible, can’t we get that for somebody else? And if so let’s do it. Let’s give it a shot. And I will tell you, I still feel strongly. I never talk much about things like “a calling.” I actually feel drawn to this. I feel like I am merely being obedient. This is what I want you to do, Ron. You are my hands and my feet to help this community of underserved people. That’s what I needed to do. And I’m just snapping off my salute, saying, absolutely. Put me in, Coach. So that’s how we started the business.

David Hirsch: Wow. So gimme a sense, give our listeners a sense, how many square feet? What type of services or exercise fitness programs are available currently? Just to put things in perspective.

Ron Janowczyk: So we bring them into that social environment. And I will tell you, because I’ve seen it with my own eyes, that the neurotypical people inside that gym come to know the people that we are working with. They will finally introduce themself. They will come over, high five someone, fist pump them, call ’em by name. And I will tell you, for many of them, it’s the first time in their lives that someone has actually spoken to them in that way. We believe strongly between mind and body connection and that’s firing right away when they step inside that gym.

So the kinds of things we do are adaptive. They’re highly specialized to whatever challenge they have. And so there are people with Down syndrome. There are people with cerebral palsy. There are neurotypical people that are either amputees or have MS that come in and say, geez, my insurance won’t pay for physical therapy anymore, but I know this is helping me. Can you guys help? And we build and we do program design based on that individual and that individual’s goals and some of their obstacles. But we also do in-home training. So we can definitely work with the youngers in-home or even the elderly in an elder fitness situation.

David Hirsch: I love it. Thank you for sharing. So I’m thinking about advice now and I’m wondering if there’s any advice beyond perhaps the scope of our conversation, advice that you can offer a dad who might be closer to the beginning of his journey, raising a child with special needs. Or somebody who is inspired by the story, the Special Strong story, and wants to be more focused on athletics.

Ron Janowczyk: Sure. I think I mentioned one earlier and I think this probably transcends athletics. It goes to anything. Your child, despite what you may see today, is going to change somebody’s life and probably in a pretty impactful way. I would also say learn from your kid. I can’t tell you how many times we have felt two-inches tall because Jake has no prejudices. Jake does not see age, he doesn’t see gender, he doesn’t see race. If you’re Jake’s friend, you’re Jake’s friend. And I see that in a lot of kids with special needs. They simply lack the prejudices that we do. And it’s refreshing to see. So I would pass that on to people. Learn from your child.

David Hirsch: If I can paraphrase: Don’t set any limits. Be aware that your child’s gonna make a difference, maybe a profound difference, in someone else’s life, if not other people’s lives. And then learn from your kids. Have a heightened level of awareness. So is there anything else you’d like to say before we wrap up?

Ron Janowczyk: My faith is much stronger as a result of Jake. I think my wife would say the same thing. I think looking back, I mean we were 36, I was rising in my career, positive things were happening and here comes Jake. And to look back at it now I just think about it differently and I say, you know what it was? I honestly believe God wanted my wife and my kids and us just to be closer to Him. And so He blessed us with Jake.

David Hirsch: Very powerful.

Ron Janowczyk: Lastly, I don’t know if I like what I would’ve become had Jake not come around. I think I am a better husband, a better dad, a better friend, brother, boss, neighbor, all because of 26 years with Jake.

David Hirsch: Yeah. What I heard you say, and not in so many words but very similar to what I’ve heard other dads say, which is I wouldn’t have asked for a child with special needs. But looking back on it, knowing everything you know today, I wouldn’t change anything.

Ron Janowczyk: Nothing.

David Hirsch: Very profound. Thank you, Ron.

Ron Janowczyk: You’re welcome.

David Hirsch: So let’s give a special shout out to our mutual friend, Daniel Stein of Special Strong, for helping connect us.

Ron Janowczyk: Yes. Thank you, Daniel. Appreciate it very much.

David Hirsch: If somebody wants to learn more about Special Strong or contact you, what’s the best way to do that?

Ron Janowczyk: Absolutely. I am Ron.Janowczyk@SpecialStrong.com.

David Hirsch: Excellent. We’ll be sure to include that in the show notes so it makes it as easy as possible for somebody to follow up.

Ron Janowczyk: [laughing] And they don’t have to pronounce it.

David Hirsch: Ron, thank you for your time and many insights. As a reminder, Ron is just one of the dads who’s part of the Special Fathers Network, a mentoring program for fathers raising a child with special needs. If you’d like to be a mentor father, or are seeking advice from a mentor father with a similar situation to your own, please go to 21stCenturyDads.org.

Thank you for listening to the latest episode of the Special Fathers Network Dad to Dad Podcast. I hope you enjoyed the conversation as much as I did. As you probably know, the 21st Century Dads Foundation is a 501c3 not-for-profit organization, which means we need your help to keep our content free to all concerned. Would you please consider making a tax-deductible contribution? I would really appreciate your support. Ron, thanks again.

Ron Janowczyk: Thank you, David. I appreciate it.

Tom Couch: And thank you for listening to the Special Fathers Network Dad to Dad Podcast. The Special Fathers Network is a dad to dad mentoring program for fathers raising children with special needs. Through our personalized matching process, new fathers with special needs children match up with mentor fathers in a similar situation. It’s a great way for dads to support other dads. To find out more, go to 21stCenturyDads.org.

David Hirsch: And if you’re a dad looking for help or would like to offer help, we would be honored to have you join our closed Facebook group. Please go to Facebook.com, groups, and search “dad to dad.” Lastly, we’re always looking to share interesting stories. If you’d like to share your story or know of a compelling story, please send an email to David@21stCenturyDads.org.

Tom Couch: The Special Fathers Network Dad to Dad Podcast was produced by me, Tom Couch.

Thanks again to Horizon Therapeutics who believe that science and compassion must work together to transform lives. That’s why they work tirelessly to research, develop, and bring forward medicines for people living with rare and rheumatic diseases. Discover more about Horizon Therapeutics at HorizonTherapeutics.com.