286 – Faye Simon-Harac Editor-In-Chief at Exceptional Parent Magazine & President/Founder of IES Brain Research Foundation

Transcript:

Tom Couch: [00:00:00] Special thanks to Horizon Therapeutics for sponsoring the Special Fathers Network Dad to Dad Podcast. Working tirelessly to research, develop, and bring forward medicines for people living with rare and rheumatic diseases. Discover more about Horizon Therapeutics mission at HorizonTherapeutics. com.

Faye Simon: You may feel like other people don’t understand what you’re going through, and it’s very possibly true.

But many, many people in your life want to help. So, ask for help. Tell them very specifically what you need. Do you need somebody to go to the store for you? Do you need somebody to watch a child that maybe doesn’t have a disability so you can spend more time with your child with a disability? Do you need somebody to watch a child with a disability so you can take out your other child?

What do you need? The more specific you can be. The more likely they will be able to help.

Tom Couch: That’s our guest this [00:01:00] week, Faye Simon, a former teacher and current editor in chief of Exceptional Parent Magazine, offering tools for positive change in the special needs community, which they’ve been doing for some 50 years.

Faye is also founder of the Irene and Eric Simon Brain Research Foundation. She’s an amazing woman with an amazing story to tell. And we’ll hear that story in this week’s Special Fathers Network, Dad to Dad Podcast. Now say hello to the founder of the Special Fathers Network and the host of the Dad to Dad Podcast, David Hirsch.

David Hirsch: Hi, and thanks for listening to the Special Fathers Network Dad to Dad Podcast, presented by the Special Fathers Network, a dad to dad mentoring program for fathers raising children with special needs. The Special Fathers Network Mastermind Group Experience is the most comprehensive program the 21st Century Dads Foundation offers.

Dads raising children with special needs meet virtually on a weekly basis and form meaningful relationships. While sharing weekly wins, discussing books, and sharing heartfelt challenges, [00:02:00] one of the highlights of the year is attending an in person weekend retreat. We’re launching 10 new SFN Mastermind Groups in January 2024, with 10 dads per group.

That means we’re only looking for 10 like minded dads in each of the following locations. Anchorage, Alaska, Bellevue, Nebraska, Chicago, Illinois, Denver, Colorado, Georgetown, Grand Cayman, Houston, Texas, Indianapolis, Indiana, London, England, Nashville, Tennessee, and Reykjavik, Iceland. If you’re a dad raising a child with special needs in one of these cities, we hope you’ll join the local SFN Mastermind Group and make the investment to become the best version of yourself.

For more information, visit us Please see the show notes or simply go to 21stCenturyDads. org

Tom Couch: Now let’s hear this fascinating conversation between Faye Simon and David Hirsch

David Hirsch: I’m thrilled to be talking today with Faye Simon of Sparta, New Jersey who’s [00:03:00] the editor in chief at Exceptional Parent Magazine, a national publication whose mission is to develop a Translate and share information as tools for positive change for the special needs community.

Faye is also the founder of the Irene and Eric Simon Brain Research Foundation, created in honor of her parents. Faye, thank you for taking the time to do a podcast interview for the Special Fathers Network.

Faye Simon: Thank you so much for having me, David. Excited to be here.

David Hirsch: You and your husband, Len Herrick, have been married for 20 years and are the proud parents of two fur babies.

Let’s start with some background. Where did you grow up? Tell me something about your family.

Faye Simon: Well, I grew up in Bergen County, New Jersey. Um, my dad was, um, born in Germany, came over when he was 14 years old, um, had to escape the Nazis, his family. My mom grew up in, uh, uh, Cleveland, Ohio. They met, fell madly in love the first time they saw them.

It was a Hollywood story. And [00:04:00] when mom passed, it was five days before their 70th anniversary and they were still totally in love.

David Hirsch: That is wild. Thank you for sharing. Did you have any siblings when you were growing up?

Faye Simon: I have an older brother and a younger brother.

David Hirsch: Okay.

Faye Simon: They are scattered.

David Hirsch: And did anybody follow in your dad’s footsteps?

Faye Simon: No, surprisingly nobody did. Um, I grew up and always knew that I wanted to work with children. I became an early childhood teacher. And I taught early childhood for 15 years. I had worked in Head Start for a couple of years and then, um, got this opportunity when I decided to stop teaching, not because I wanted to stop teaching, but I had moved and the commute was really tough.

So I found a way that I could still help parents and children by working with Special Needs Magazine, Exceptional Parent Magazine.

David Hirsch: So out of curiosity, what did your dad do for a living?

Faye Simon: My dad [00:05:00] was a brilliant and very, very well respected neuroscientist. He headed a lab at NYU Medical Center for 54 years.

He actually was very well known in his field, and he was considered a pioneer in the field of brain research on addiction and pain. He discovered opiate receptors in the brain, and he, everybody loves to hear this fact, he coined the word endorphins.

David Hirsch: Really? Okay. I don’t know if I’m going to be able to use that in some trivia type of way, but uh

Faye Simon: Maybe it’ll be on Jeopardy!

David Hirsch: Yeah, there you go. And how would you describe your relationship with your dad?

Faye Simon: I was very, very close with both my parents, wonderful people, loving people. Mom grew up very, very poor, and yet she was one of the most generous, loving, warm people. Dad, despite having to leave his country and his friends, was another extremely [00:06:00] warm, loving person who was interested in everyone that he met, Whether you were a custodian, a teacher, the president of the United States, he would treat you the same.

David Hirsch: Yeah, well, those are some important values. And, uh, you’re reminding me from a prior conversation that, uh, our families have a very similar history, uh, coming over from Germany and Russia, if I remember, on your mom’s side. And, uh, it’s pretty remarkable to think that, you know, people would just pick up and leave.

Like you were describing, uh, and your dad coming over as a teenager, as a young teenager, um, having to learn the language and, you know, sort of come up to speed. Did he ever talk about it?

Faye Simon: Oh, yeah. I loved hearing his stories and I was always so impressed because he came over and he didn’t really know English and they wanted to see him.

Put him back a couple grades and he said, no, I want the chance to prove myself. And if I don’t make it and you know, a few months, then, and they let him and not only did he prove himself, but he [00:07:00] graduated college in two and a half years. He was brilliant.

David Hirsch: It sounds like he was very smart. Yeah. Anyway, um, I’m sort of curious to know if there was some important takeaways, uh, from your relationship with your dad, a lesson learned.

Faye Simon: Wow. So many, where do I start? He was one of the most forgiving people you’d ever want to meet. I wish I could be 10 percent as forgiving as he was. Both my parents always instilled that you do the best job you can no matter what you’re doing. They don’t care if you’re washing dishes, mopping a floor, or the President of the United States, a teacher, a nurse, you do the best you can.

David Hirsch: The message I’m hearing from you is that They were very kind, understanding, and uh, very respectful, right? Regardless of what your station in life was. That’s what I heard you say.

Faye Simon: Oh, absolutely. Absolutely. He, he loved life, my dad. I always would say at different events, I’d say, if you see in the [00:08:00] dictionary joie de vivre, you’re going to see my dad’s face next to that.

He loved life right till the end and people and his family and friends. Everybody just had a lot of love. Both of them.

David Hirsch: Great role models. So I’m thinking about other father influencers and I’m thinking about your grandfathers first on your dad’s side and then on your mom’s side. Did you know your grandfather, Simon, at all or not?

Faye Simon: Yes, I was very lucky. I knew both of them. My mom’s dad I knew till I was a teenager. And my dad’s dad a few years later. And they were both very warm and loving. I knew them as well as you could when, since they were in Ohio, we only got to see them, you know, a few times a year. It wasn’t like, I always envied people who had their grandparents that lived 10 minutes away, you know, and it blows me away when they have their grandparents so close and they never see them.

I would [00:09:00] have loved that. But, um, they were both really very hardworking people. My grandfather, uh, lost his wife when she was 40 years old and he had three kids. And it was around the time of the depression and yet he kept working and he took care of them and he made it through and my Grandfather on my father’s side, the Nazis stole his business and left him with nothing.

And so when they came here, he started selling light bulbs door to door, never complained, never sat back and asked for assistance. And he developed a really successful lighting company. So they were very hard workers and they really inspired me a lot.

David Hirsch: Yeah, well, it’s remarkable that our families have paralleled each other like they have from being German business owners, like you described.

Um, that was my grandfather’s experience. He had to leave or they decided to leave when he was in his thirties. [00:10:00] My dad was seven and started over. He never talked about it though. He was very bitter. And, um, it wasn’t until like a year or two ago, one of my sons was looking into our family history, which I had researched quite a bit.

And, Years and decades ago. And he said, uh, who is Inaz Hirsch? I said, well, that was a grandpa Harry’s, my grandpa, Harry’s father. He goes, did you know that he died in a concentration camp? Like, oh my God, I never knew that. And my grandfather has been gone for 25 years. And I’m thinking. Maybe that’s why he was so bitter and he didn’t want to talk about it, but we, we never had that conversation.

So it was pretty chilling for me to come to that realization. It was an eye opener. Anyway, a different time and place, but, uh, you know, there’s things going on today that seem to mirror, uh, What was going on in the world during World War II. So, uh, [00:11:00] you know, hopefully we can learn from the lessons of our past and maybe not repeat some of the same mistakes.

So

my recollection was you went to NYU, your dad worked there. So there was probably a little bit of a financial incentive for you to do that.

Faye Simon: Absolutely. I couldn’t justify costing my parents a bunch of money when I could go to a very good school for free. I mean, that just, I couldn’t do it.

David Hirsch: Yeah. Well, I know that if I worked at a university, knowing my five kids, they would be negotiating with me what they were going to get.

in exchange for taking the path of the free education.

Faye Simon: Oh, that’s funny. Yeah. And that’s how generous my parents were because I could have gotten it for free and I could have also gone anywhere in the country I wanted to go. [00:12:00] But I, that’s not my heart. That’s not the kind of person I am. I wouldn’t even occur to me to negotiate.

I just felt that, you know, my parents were always supportive and, and generous and I could save them money here and still go to a great school. How would I do anything different?

David Hirsch: Yeah, well. I don’t know if the world’s a little bit different or if we’ve raised different kids, but uh, they’re they’re not all business people, but there’s Three or four of them that are, are sort of along those lines.

They would be thinking along those lines. So anyway, I’m wondering when you graduated from NYU, where does it, that your career took you?

Faye Simon: Well, I always knew I wanted to teach. And in between I had like worked as an assistant. I worked with multiple handicapped children. I worked with deaf blind children.

And so when I graduated, I knew I wanted to teach. And I taught in New Jersey. First at one school and then at another until I moved away and decided, okay, the [00:13:00] commute is just too much. I didn’t really want to start over in another school and they wouldn’t let me take my tenure at that time, even within the state.

And I said, I just don’t want to start over. And I tried a couple of different things just to use different skills. I did some event coordinating and marketing. When I stopped teaching I had the time and the thought of starting the Brain Research Foundation So I just feel like everything was meant to be.

I mean, I loved teaching. I loved my kids. They grew tremendously and It was very rewarding, but then it was time for a new chapter.

David Hirsch: Yeah. Well, thanks for sharing You really can’t connect the dots looking forward. You can only look back and sort of see you know how things have transpired or come together and And I’m sort of curious to know, prior to your work at Exceptional Parent Magazine, Was your connection to the disability or special needs community through teaching, like you were just saying?

Faye Simon: [00:14:00] Yes, strictly. I worked with multiple handicapped children. I lived in New Hampshire for a year. I worked with deafblind children. And then even when I was in the public school system, I had several children in my classroom, although mainstream, that had disabilities. Disabilities or learning issues or whatever, um, to the point that.

The administration felt that I had so much patience and success with them, they tended to put more and more of those children in my classroom. And people would tease me, even though I wasn’t a special ed teacher, you have a special ed class, but I didn’t. But that’s what Allowed me to, uh, understand and realize how important it is to help children that have any kind of disability and help the families and their caregivers.

And so this just follows right along [00:15:00] with. What I like to do anyway, you know, being able to help the children, the families, the caretakers. I mean, we even have teachers and other professionals reading the magazine. So it’s, it’s very, very rewarding and exciting.

David Hirsch: I think one of the reasons that I identify with your story is that my mom was a career educator in Chicago Public Schools.

And she started in second grade for maybe a decade, decade and a half, went down to first grade for a decade, and then she taught special ed the last third of her career. And, uh, she, she had more patience than anybody.

Faye Simon: You have to. It

David Hirsch: was amazing.

Faye Simon: You have to or you shouldn’t be in that field.

David Hirsch: This is not politically correct, but I will be transparent and say that, um, I used to joke and this might mean something more to you because of the neuroscientist father that you had.

But I, I joked, I said, Mom, you must’ve had a lobotomy, right? To do this type of work year after year, decade after decade. And, uh, she would just sort of laugh and say, Oh yeah, [00:16:00] I just really enjoy, you know, working with young kids and regardless of what their circumstance was. So it was just part of who she was.

Faye Simon: You know, it’s really a matter of everybody has their niche. You know, I know people who worked with. middle school and high school. That was not my cup of tea. I mean, I love kids and I’ll work any age, but what my forte was with the young children, I had the patience. I had the ability to break activities down to the steps that they needed, which is helpful when children with any kind of learning disability or intellectual disability was in my classroom.

Because one of the things is very important is being able to break the down into very, very small steps and celebrating every small step that they achieve.

David Hirsch: Excellent point. So let’s talk about EP Magazine. Um, how long has it been in existence?

Faye Simon: It [00:17:00] has been in existence since 1971. I’ve been with it about eight years.

David Hirsch: And what was it that drew you to going to work at EP Magazine and what did you do initially?

Faye Simon: Well, to be honest, the magazine was struggling and my husband, who is a business consultant, learned about it and was asked to either take it through bankruptcy or save it. And when he was talking about it, I said, I know this magazine.

I know how important it is to parents and teachers. And at that time it was perfect timing because I had stopped teaching and I said, I will help you. And so we have brought back the print magazine because they had stopped that. We have made the digital version free because people had to pay for the digital version.

And we’ve expanded topics and we’ve just really been expanding the audience. It’s very exciting. I mean, I’m just so thrilled with the response I’m getting and how happy people are that we’ve, you know, continued it.

David Hirsch: So what is your role [00:18:00] as editor in chief?

Faye Simon: I guess you could say I do everything except the design work.

Um, well, I have to communicate with possible authors, get articles every month. We do have a editorial calendar where we have And we’ll have a certain amount of articles on theme, but we also do articles not on theme that we will call features. Um, I read and edit every single article that’s going to go into the magazine.

I also work on expanding the audience. I’m creating partnerships with organizations. I do a little bit of ad sales. I mean, the way we keep the magazine going, because it’s not a moneymaker, it’s a work of love, um, a labor of love, I guess they call it, but we want to keep it going. So we do have to have some advertisers.

So I’ll do some of that, you know, basically keeping the content going, the audience increasing and letting everybody know, [00:19:00] whether through social media or partnerships, that they can read the magazine for free.

David Hirsch: Thanks for sharing. It does sound like you wear a lot of hats. Yes! More

Faye Simon: than I bargained for.

David Hirsch: Well, some women own a lot of shoes, you own a lot of hats.

Faye Simon: Right.

David Hirsch: So I’m wondering about the scope or scale of the publication. How many digital subscribers do you reach? How many print subscribers do you reach?

Faye Simon: The very, very large majority are digital subscribers. And at this point we have almost 16, 000 and the print is much less in terms of the actual subscriptions, but some of the subscriptions go to schools or business offices or doctor’s offices.

So many, many people are reading it. From being in a waiting room or wherever they put it for their clients or their patients.

David Hirsch: Well, I have to say that I’ve been a proud subscriber for quite a few years, and I look forward to getting it on a monthly basis. I know that the online version is a rich resource as [00:20:00] well, but there’s something about actually physically touching the magazine, being able to turn pages, Tear pages out and, you know, share with other people for that matter.

Faye Simon: Well, you know, that’s why we brought the print magazine back because a, some people really prefer it. Some people need it. They can’t handle the digital version. The digital version, just so everybody knows is page for page. It is the exact magazine page for page, but they can read it for free and online.

But the two things that I find, really exciting is people with visual problems can have it read to with universal features and they can print any page they want that they would like to hold or share with somebody. So I think those are two really great features of the digital version as well.

David Hirsch: I would add the third feature and I don’t think it’s one that I’d Take advantage of, but you can change the font size, right?

You can increase the size of the page, zooming in and zooming out. So if somebody had visual impairment, that might make [00:21:00] it a little bit easier as well.

Faye Simon: Right. If they don’t want to have it read to them, absolutely. And they can print it. So, you know, yeah, so many different possibilities. But my dream and my goal is it Everybody who can benefit from this wonderful information, inspiring stories and resources, knows that they have the option to read it for free.

That’s my big dream. And that’s why I appreciate everybody like you and everybody else who’s sharing with other people, sharing on their blogs or on their websites or on social media. I so appreciate that because that’s what we’d like at this point.

David Hirsch: So what are some of the challenges of just producing a print and online publication like you do?

Faye Simon: I would say one of the biggest challenges is making sure we have enough advertisers so that we can keep it going, keep EP for free, and keep it at least even, breaking even. That’s probably the biggest. I’m hoping [00:22:00] as more and more people know about it and the audience is growing, that that will become easier because I’d rather focus my time on the articles and the authors and the readers than having to think about, you know.

Do we have enough for next year? Uh, that probably is the biggest, I mean, as far as getting articles, not only do I find people, but people find me and would like, we don’t pay for the articles, which I think is really, you know, a statement. People want to publish. We all have the same heart. We are here to help people that have somebody in their family with a disability or special healthcare need.

And we cover all ages. Infancy to Elderly and so to know that we have so many people that are interested in contributing an article without any compensation just shows how many people out there care.

David Hirsch: Yeah, well you didn’t make reference to this but one of the sections of the [00:23:00] publication that I enjoy and I always look forward to seeing in the back is is the military section.

Faye Simon: You’re right.

David Hirsch: And I’m wondering, what was it that, uh, prompted, uh, you, or maybe it was predates you, to Carve out a section for military families.

Faye Simon: This predates me. I can’t take credit, although we absolutely keep it. And I think we’ve been doing a great job, but military families, in addition to unfortunately, soldiers coming home with disabilities because of the war, military families are constantly moving.

And when they have a child with a disability, It is much more difficult than somebody who is set and at their home and staying and not having to move and can create a network of support and have the professionals they need. So realizing this is how the military section was started. And the more [00:24:00] I talk to people and get involved with people who are military families or military personnel, I’m constantly reminded that yes, it really is important and appreciated.

David Hirsch: You know, I want to use this as an opportunity to give, uh, Shelly Huttonen, uh, a shout out. She’s the one that has Oh, you know her? Well, I learned about her just because of your magazine and then, um, I’d have to go back and timestamp this, but, uh, I reached out to her and we were looking to draw attention to, you know, what was going on in the lives of military families from the Special Fathers Network Dad to Dad Podcast.

And uh, I interviewed her husband, Mark.

Faye Simon: Wonderful. That is great. I am that we, we connected you.

David Hirsch: Yeah. And that goes back to, uh, like middle of the pandemic, I think it was toward the end of 2021. So two, two plus years ago now. So anyway, uh, the publication does have an impact. Uh, some of it, you know, because people will communicate with you and some of it you’ll never know, right.

They just read an [00:25:00] article or they make a connection that they wouldn’t know what that is make. And you don’t know that firsthand, but you know that you’re doing the right thing, right? And that’s why I’m inspired by the work that you do and the dedication that you and your colleagues there at Exceptional Parent Magazine have to producing this very valuable resource for the community.

So, uh, who are the primary sponsors?

Faye Simon: Well, right now, we have MassMutual, who have really been our foundation. We have Kaiser Benton, who have been with us for years. We have Bantex Sanitizing. Those are the most consistent. And we do have some new people. We have a lawyer that’s very interested. We have a financial person that’s very interested.

We have a Georgie Norman who’s been doing many, many articles. She now is advertising. So, you know, it’s just really wonderful because there’s [00:26:00] two kinds of advertisers. We generally get, we get people who really want their services and products in front of the special needs community. And then we get businesses.

It’s probably more like MassMutual where there really is, you know, a feeling of wanting to give back and wanting to support the special needs community and particularly this amazing magazine.

David Hirsch: That’s good to know. Thanks for sharing. Any, um Visions for the future, anything different that you’re sort of percolating that you can, uh, talk about here?

Faye Simon: I hate to talk about something that I don’t know if will come about. So yeah, I have a few ideas that I probably won’t share them yet. Maybe in the future I’ll share them. But I would say my main focus now is growing the readership, following my dream of wanting everybody who could benefit from this information knowing they can read it for free, Establishing enough advertisers that we know that this magazine is set [00:27:00] and can go year after year and break even.

I think that those are my goals. And also, we are constantly expanding our topics. Like for instance, AP Magazine, you might remember because you’ve been reading it for a long time. They didn’t have a month. dedicated to elderly. And since we feel that it’s very important to, you know, cover from infancy to elderly, and usually you have a disability of some kind, you’re going to grow from a kid to an adult or elderly with a disability.

So we felt it was very important. So now we have a month dedicated to elderly. We have a month dedicated now to hearing, vision, and language. So, there are certain things that we’re trying to just give a little more focus on, but we’re also, within the 12 months, I wish there were more than 12 months so we could have more themes, but, um, we’re constantly expanding, and I actually, I love it when the readers, [00:28:00] and some of them do, like I had um, somebody on social media say I’d love to see some articles about having more than one child with a disability.

Wonderful. I now have about six authors that have submitted articles. So I love it when the readers give me feedback of what they’d like to see more of, or if there’s a gap that we’re not covering for them, some kind of new topic. So I’m always open to readers Reaching out to me because I just want to make it better and better and better.

David Hirsch: I’m wondering, having heard that, if there’s any, um, story or stories that come to mind that you can attribute an impact, you know, a direct impact that the publications had, you know, one of those, you know, dividends, you get special dividends out of the blue where you learn about something positive that’s occurred just because.

Faye Simon: Actually, I’ve had many messages, which I’m thrilled about. [00:29:00] Some of it’s from parents. Like I had one that has two sons, one more severe than the other, that have, She has a few times written and said, this article really helped me. I was able to see something different that I can use with my sons. We have other parents that have reached out to me in that way.

And we even have educators who have reached out and said, oh my goodness, thank you so much. This has helped me. Now I can help my students better. So we, Thankfully, have that fairly often, very positive feedback. If you asked me before, I would prepare a few specific stories, but yes, we do get feedback like that.

And it is very exciting, whether it’s on social media, whether people email me, they have often thanked me or told me, hey, this specific article made a difference in our family.

David Hirsch: That’s fabulous. Well, let’s switch gears and talk about the Irene and [00:30:00] Eric Simon Brain Research Foundation created in 2004 to honor your parents while they were still alive.

So what motivated you to start this?

Faye Simon: That’s an interesting question. The best I can say is between teaching and this, as I mentioned to you, I was working a little bit on event coordinating and fundraising and marketing and I was helping Somebody do some events that benefited charities. All I could say is it came from above because one day I got this idea of doing something in the field that my dad was so passionate about and he was passionate about his work.

So I came up with this idea of doing a brain research foundation. It was a surprise though, so I couldn’t talk to my dad about it. This is a surprise. I decided to put in both my parents names because as I told you before, they had the most amazing love, loving marriage, [00:31:00] respected each other, liked each other, spent so much time together.

When he was elected treasurer of this organization, she actually being a bookkeeper, did all the work. So they basically said they got two for one. But the bottom line is it seemed right to put both their names on it. So I started it as a surprise. I talked to a few of his colleagues and I said, look, I’m going to do this.

It’s going to be volunteer run. I’d like to make a difference, but I’m not sure exactly what direction to go. I don’t think I can raise a billion dollars, but with what I’m hoping to raise, what do you think we could do to make a difference? And the scientists said, you know, students are not going into basic research as much as they used to because they know how difficult it is to get funding.

They said what we would love to do is attract more bright students into the field. And that’s how we started the Summer Fellowship [00:32:00] program.

David Hirsch: So what is a Summer Fellowship and how does it work?

Faye Simon: The Summer Fellowship is They get an award of 2, 500 at this point for the summer because the goal is that they don’t have to look for a full time job.

What we want them to be able to do is, for the summer, work with an outstanding neuroscientist in their lab, learning, and seeing if this is what they would like to make their career in. We have these amazing people. Outstandingly brilliant students applying. And I have a scientific committee that looks through the applications and makes the decisions.

Now they look at a few things. They look at the student. They look at the project. And they look at the lab. So we’re a little bit tsunami in the meaning that we do not give the fellowship to somebody who started a lab two years ago. We don’t give it to a student who wants [00:33:00] to work in a lab of somebody who is not super experienced, published, brilliant, and really a top rate person.

I mean, we’ve had students work with a couple Nobel Prize winners. We’ve had students work with a World Autism Award winner. We’ve had students work in Yale, Harvard, NYU, Columbia. We’ve had them working in outstanding universities with amazing people. A rated, top notch neuroscientists who are heads of a lab.

So they get to work the whole summer, they get mentored, and what we did in the past before COVID is we had a dinner or a lunch, and some of the students and the mentors came and they talked about their summer experience. And it was wonderful. First of all, The students were enthusiastic, intelligent, I mean, they were amazing.

The scientists were brilliant and great mentors and the [00:34:00] audience came up to me and they would say things like, wow, I see where my money’s going. I have hope for the future. So it’s very exciting because that’s exactly what we want is hope for the future.

David Hirsch: Well, it’s amazing from this very humble beginning 19 years ago that you’ve had some 120 of these summer fellowships over the last 19 years and I’m wondering are there any individuals who were students who become prominent Neuroscientists today

Faye Simon: the majority of the students actually have gone on for their PhD or MD PhD in neuroscience And we’ve had some of them themselves Themselves receiving awards We had one student who actually was part of a lab that discovered a treatment for brain cancer.

There’s a lot that I can’t just say off the top of my head, but yeah, they really have been successful in their own [00:35:00] right in many ways.

David Hirsch: And about how many individuals do you get to apply for these fellowships on an annual basis?

Faye Simon: Depends on the year we’ve had anywhere from 30 to a hundred. We started in 2005, we gave out two fellowships, then four fellowships.

We worked up to the last, I’m not sure how many years at 10 each summer, but in total from 2005 to 2019 when we last before COVID, It was 120 fellowships.

David Hirsch: Wow.

Faye Simon: And in all different areas. I mean, basic research, what is very exciting that I learned from my dad is, you could be studying brain cancer, you could be studying autism, you could be studying Alzheimer’s, and a bunch of the research can be shared because it overlaps, because it’s, How does the brain work and what happens when it doesn’t work?

So there’s a lot of overlap. So we accept all different types of basic research in different diseases and, and brain conditions.

David Hirsch: I love it. Well, I’m looking forward [00:36:00] to learning more about the 20 year anniversary that you have planned for June of 2024.

Faye Simon: Well, we, um, are going to have our first event since, um, COVID and since losing my dad, unfortunately, we lost my dad beginning with COVID.

Devastating for me. So it’s taken me a while to be able to get back into the swing of things, but he and my mom would have been 100 years old in 2024. And that will be the 20th anniversary of when we announced as a surprise to my parents. So we will be having a golf outing and dinner. In Sparta, New Jersey, beautiful Lake Mohawk Golf Club.

And we will do that on June 3rd, which will be a day after my dad would have been a hundred years old.

Tom Couch: I love it. We’ll be back with more of the conversation on the Special Fathers Network, Dad to Dad Podcast in just a few moments. But first this quick message. Please help 21st century dads gather [00:37:00] research on families raising children with special needs by having them complete the Special Fathers Network Early Intervention Parents Survey.

A link to the survey can be found in the show notes. As a token of our appreciation, each person, mom or dad, who completes the survey will receive a great dad coin. Thank you. Now, back to the conversation.

David Hirsch: I’m thinking about advice now, and I’m wondering what Advice can you share with parents, specifically dads, raising children with special needs?

Faye Simon: I think that number one, whether it’s dads or moms, that the more information they can get, the more educated they are, uh, the better. But most important, I think, for parents and dads, too, finding support, whether it’s family, friends, Professionals, neighbors, teachers, the support is very important and one of the things and there are actually several [00:38:00] articles written by some of our contributors talking about you may feel like other people don’t understand what you’re going through and it’s very possibly true but many many people in your life want to help.

So ask for help. Tell them very specifically what you need. Do you need somebody to go to the store for you? Do you need somebody to watch a child that maybe doesn’t have a disability so you can spend more time with your child with a disability? Do you need somebody to watch a child with a disability so you can take out your other child?

What do you need? The more specific you can be. The more likely they will be able to help because no, if they haven’t walked in your shoes, most likely they don’t completely understand. They may want to, but I say to the dads, share your feelings, share your needs, ask for help. If it’s a two parent family, talk to each other, get [00:39:00] others from the outside to help you.

I know Shelly, as you talk about, she writes beautiful articles and is so open and vulnerable. And she talks about, you know, following somebody who’s been there before. Maybe their child is a teenager and your child’s young. Follow them and then somebody can follow you. So it really is what, you know, not to be a cliche, but it takes a village.

And so my advice is to use that village, reach out, ask, and be as clear as you can what you need, is what I would say.

David Hirsch: Well, your advice is crystal clear. Gather information and educate yourself to be more well informed. Find those supports, whether they be family, friends, or professionals. And then, um, the third point you made, which is asking for help.

And I think that’s one of the most difficult things for dads. Asking for help. Remember, we’re the gender that doesn’t pull over and ask for directions when we’re lost. And, you know, that’s just the [00:40:00] sad reality. You know, we sort of joke about it being testosterone poisoning and, you know, it’s the inability to ask for help or to seek advice.

I think historically, or for some reason, you know, it’s been perceived as a weakness. In reality, it’s a strength. Right. If you can overcome the challenges, mental hurdles, ego, whatever it might be to say, Hey, I don’t have it figured out. I’m not satisfied with where I’m at. I want better outcomes. And it’s beyond my, you know, personal ability.

And, uh, you know, the more people that can, um, come to that realization, the sooner, the better, right? So you’re not, you know, being in denial or denying your son or daughter of the resources and the services that they might benefit from. So anyway, thank you again for sharing.

Faye Simon: I agree with you. I agree with you completely.

And there’s one thing I just thought of as you were talking that might make it easier for some [00:41:00] dads. Maybe you should think about it as not asking for help for yourself. You are asking for help. I’m not asking to help your child. You’d go to a doctor if your child is sick. You would go, whatever you need for your child.

Well, A, if you can get some respite, you’re going to be a better father for your child. If you can spend individual time with your children, if you have more than one child, whether they both have disabilities or not. So maybe think about it as helping your child, not asking for help for yourself. Maybe that could help some of the men.

David Hirsch: That’s a good point. Is there anything else you’d like to say before we wrap up?

Faye Simon: I can’t think of anything else. I hope that people listening will sign up for EP for free at the website. I think there’s a tremendous amount of valuable information. I would love to hear from people if they have any suggestions, questions, things they’d like to see in the magazine.

I appreciate [00:42:00] anybody and everybody who shares so other people can learn about it. Of course, if they know somebody wants to advertise, we’re always open to that. And, uh, if anybody is in the New Jersey area and would like to come to the golf outing and dinner, the information will eventually be on the website, but they can always reach out to me.

All I can say is thank you so much for having me today and sharing these two things that I’m so passionate about.

David Hirsch: If somebody wants to learn more about Exceptional Parent Magazine, the Irene and Eric Simon Brain Research Foundation are to contact you. What’s the best way to do that?

Faye Simon: Well, for the magazine, www.

epmagazine. com, has everything. It has the magazine, it has the ability to sign up for EP for free. It has contact information. So you’ll have my email and you can, Even for the Brain Research Foundation, if you happen to email me there, I’ll still answer, but the website is www. iesbrainresearch. org. We’re [00:43:00] actually in the process, uh, shortly, um, hopefully by the new year, you’ll see a new website, but it is there right now.

We have to update it. We haven’t done a lot since COVID and losing my dad, but, um, we’re working on it now. But either way, you can get me through the websites and email. Uh, we’re also a love for, you know, those people who are really social media people. We have Facebook. That’s Exceptional Parent Mag, M A G, is for Facebook and E P M Zine is for Twitter and Instagram and it’s important to know that it’s E P M Zine because the others that used to be in the full name are just no longer active and we have nothing to do with that unfortunately because of the death of a person from the magazine who didn’t leave us the information.

So it’s E P M Zine for both Twitter and Instagram. Exceptional Parent Mag. IES Brain Research Foundation, we have the website, and we [00:44:00] have Instagram and Twitter and Facebook as well.

David Hirsch: I’ll be sure to include as much of that information in the show notes, so it’ll make it as easy as possible for somebody to follow up with you.

Faye, thank you for your time and many insights. As a reminder, Faye is just one of the individuals who’s part of the Special Fathers Network. A mentoring program for fathers raising a child with special needs. If you’d like to be a mentor father or are seeking advice from a mentor father with a similar situation to your own, please go to 21stCenturyDads.

org. Thank you for listening to the latest episode of the Special Fathers Network, Dad to Dad Podcast. I hope you enjoyed the conversation as much as I did. As you probably know, the 21st Century Dads Foundation is a 501c3 not for profit organization, which means we need your help to keep our content free to all concerned.

Would you please consider making a tax acceptable contribution? I would really appreciate your support. Faye. Thanks again.

Faye Simon: Thank you, David. I really appreciate you having me.

Tom Couch: And thank you for listening to the Special Fathers Network [00:45:00] Dad to Dad Podcast. The Special Fathers Network is a dad to dad mentoring program for fathers raising children with special needs.

Through our personalized matching process, New fathers with special needs children match up with mentor fathers in a similar situation. It’s a great way for dads to support other dads. To find out more, go to 21stCenturyDads. org.

David Hirsch: And if you’re a dad looking for help or would like to offer help, we would be honored to have you join our closed Facebook group.

Please go to Facebook. com groups and search Dad to Dad. Lastly, we’re always looking to share interesting stories. If you’d like to share your story or If you know of a compelling story, please send an email to David at 21stCenturyDads. org.

Tom Couch: The Special Fathers Network Dad to Dad Podcast was produced by me, Tom Couch, thanks again to Horizon Therapeutics, who believe that science and compassion must work together to transform lives.

That’s why they work tirelessly to [00:46:00] research, develop, and bring forward medicines for people living with rare and rheumatic diseases. Discover more about Horizon Therapeutics at HorizonTherapeutics.com